the possibility of health leading to, life with purpose.

Got to spend time with my family today. Simple days like these are some of my most favorite to look forward to.

I have been so feeling so enlightened lately, and scared at the same time. I have to admit that it is not often my heart and my head are fully in sync.

I am on this whole soul searchy I want to LIVE and have a life that has purpose path. I am really yearning for everyday to be something I look forward to doing instead of feeling like I live in a black and white superficial atmosphere.

I know it sounds stupid, but I really want to have purpose in my life and feel like I am contributing to the health and wellness of my family and anyone else that wants it.

No matter how old I get I cant ever let the dreamer and the believer in me die, because she is the core part of who I am.

It is so hard to say things like this out loud to anyone else, because I hear that voice telling me I am stupid. I know it isn't me, and I know what to do with it... but that is part of the reason I write this blog. I just have to say it, whatever I feel whatever is in my heart.

What I live and thrive off of is what is in my heart and I just have to speak it somehow.

I am so scared, and have no idea what is next for me, or my family, or my life.

All I can say is that I honestly am so thankful, for my husband because never before more in my life has he truly been my partner, more then he is right now.

I just know that no matter what happens, he is there for me. I love him for that.

The good news is, I have a little time to figure out this mission i have set myself up on, and I feel as though I am empowering myself with the best tools I know of.

Although I am really terrified of the steps I am making in my life, I am proactively doing everything I can to make whatever I dream of to work without blindly setting myself on some random course.

I think most of the people I have talked to about this a little, think I am being a massive drama queen.

I don't care though, because no one knows the courage it has taken me to get here. So although I am totally terrified, I am really proud. I am proud of who I am becoming, who I want to be, and just being brave in the face of all the negative stories I have believed about myself for as long as I can remember.