authenticity

Do you ever have those moments that something that could be potentially good comes along and no matter what you do you just cannot sell yourself on it?
Then as someone else is trying to sell you on it, you find yourself half heartedly sort of kinda of in a non committal way saying you will maybe do it to please them?

Such is the position I now find myself in.

I just cannot buy on to the norm although all the signs point to logical why I should say yes answers.

I am sure anyone else in my case would be thrilled to have an opportunity to be in my position, but I want to piss it all away for a dream, a wish, an idea, and freedom.

Ever since I turned left at the fork, I cannot get myself to slight right again. I am not upset or even the teensy bit bothered by it either. I just feel like the left is where I am going, come dirt roads, flash floods, or the city of OZ.

I been to the right, been to the right, and been to the right again.
I'm over the "right" I'm on to the ________________________.

Sadly though it means I get to make a I'm so sorry I may have slightly seriously loosely sort of agreed to maybe something I did not want to do because I like you, and I knew that I SHOULD want what your selling, but I just don't.

I hope this person understands and still likes me as much as she does now. Either way, I know what direction I am headed that is for sure :)

Here's to knowing what I want or don't want for once in my life.